Baby Steps

Had a good long talk with Marianna yesterday. She's sending me her bio soon, so before long you will get to know a little about my fabulous illustrator, "child" prodigy!

Anyhow. She is very excited about getting started again and says that with her school year over she thinks she can get illustrations done at a rate of 3 cells per day. Which means about a book every 2 weeks or so. This means I will finally have what I need together and can begin getting queries before the publishers I want to submit to!

And not a moment too soon. We are in dire straights. I try not to mention it, but it may help explain the desperation in my tone and well hey... misery loved company! So indulge me this once to get it off my chest will you?

My husband never really recovered from a back surgery he had as the result of a work related injury a year ago on March 24th. A week before the anniversary, on Saint Patty's day... he was stricken in the back by a toppled bird bath while squatting to look at potting soil at an Ace hardware. The MRI after the latter injury shows what we already know by his pain level. He is in need of a second surgery. He can hardly function. He has managed to grow a decent garden, but he pays for it every day. He has the most difficulty in dealing with our Autistic son. Though both son's can be a challenge this son is by far more difficult to manage. He literally has "melt downs" that require some physical restrain. He is persistent about having his way and will run away yelling at him and crawl under things knowing his 6'9" dad can't stoop and bend to reach him, much less wrestle or run after him. Sure the younger son does this to some degree as well. It is fairly normal, but he is not nearly so determined as his brother. I can not leave the kids with him alone. I have to take at least one of them with me to run errands or get groceries.

Meanwhile, I don't take care of myself... at all! When I'm not feverishly trying with all my might to get my work published for the income and opportunity to make a difference, I'm cooking, cleaning, sitting kids, or doctoring someone! I barely eat... at least NEVER all in one sitting, I skip baths, and stay up way to late at night to have quiet time or work. I'm beginning to have problems out of the place in my own back where I had epidurals when my kids were delivered. I think it did by far more harm that good!

My DH's (dear husband's) SSI is still in limbo and we have no income at the moment. Ace hardware is denying any liability as it is common place to set up bird baths in lawn and garden sections and are trying to find an attorney to take the case. We have had to deal with one emergency after another (flooding, renovations gone awry, plumbing nightmares [that still haven't been totally resolved] and medical bills) since he settled his workman's comp suit, until we have spent all of our savings. My DH's primary physician has a "patient account rep." who refuses to honor the out of state court order that AIG pay the medical bills and resubmit them, denying him medical care and reporting us to collections, and the neurosurgeon is reluctantly refilling a temporary prescription citing that he is a neurosurgeon, not a pain management specialist. We ignore all of the 800 #'s when they call, are returning purchases to afford medications and groceries, and are beginning to get disconnect notices on our utilities. I am about to have to apply for social services. Within the month I will no longer have my internet, phones, and possible more needed utilities.

I am getting very anxious in deed, but we have been through worse! Did I mention we are Katrina survivors? LOL God has so many times come through for us in what seems like the final hours, and this time will be no different.

Besides, I wouldn't be the first starving artist discovered while in dire straights! The rags to riches story of Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling is the scenario I keep my eyes fixed on to keep me from completely breaking down. Anyone who knows understands, that it is very easy to get sucked into a pity party and paralyzed by the gravity of the situation. All I can say is when the day comes that we are discovered, I am gunna need a make over SO bad.... and Extreme Make Over Home Edition too!

Please keep me in your prayers if you are so inclined to do such a thing, and thank you for lending me your ear.... or eye as the case may be.

Sincerely and until next time,

Sharon
(AKA a24hrmom)